The 10 Virtues of the Proverbs 31 Woman

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The 10 Virtues of the Proverbs 31 Woman

1. Faith – A Virtuous Woman serves God with all of her heart, mind, and soul. She seeks His will for her life and follows His ways. (Proverbs 31: 26, Proverbs 31: 29 – 31, Matthew 22: 37, John 14: 15, Psalm 119: 15

2. Marriage – A Virtuous Woman respects her husband. She does him good all the days of her life. She is trustworthy and a helpmeet. (Proverbs 31: 11- 12, Proverbs 31: 23, Proverbs 31: 28, 1 Peter 3, Ephesians 5, Genesis2: 18)

3.  Mothering – A Virtuous Woman teaches her children the ways of her Father in heaven. She nurtures her children with the love of Christ, disciplines them with care and wisdom, and trains them in the way they should go. (Proverbs 31: 28, Proverbs 31: 26, Proverbs 22: 6, Deuteronomy 6, Luke 18: 16)

4. Health – A Virtuous Woman cares for her body. She prepares healthy food for her family. (Proverbs 31: 14 – 15, Proverbs 31: 17, 1 Corinthians 6: 19, Genesis 1: 29, Daniel 1, Leviticus 11)

5. Service – A Virtuous Woman serves her husband, her family, her friends, and her neighbors with a gentle and loving spirit. She is charitable. (Proverbs 31: 12, Proverbs 31: 15, Proverbs 31: 20, 1 Corinthians 13: 13)

6. Finances – A Virtuous Woman seeks her husband’s approval before making purchases and spends money wisely. She is careful to purchase quality items which her family needs. (Proverbs 31: 14, Proverbs 31: 16, Proverbs 31: 18, 1 Timothy 6: 10, Ephesians 5: 23, Deuteronomy 14: 22, Numbers 18: 26)

7.  Industry – A Virtuous Woman works willingly with her hands. She sings praises to God and does not grumble while completing her tasks. (Proverbs 31: 13, Proverbs 31: 16, Proverbs 31: 24, Proverbs 31: 31, Philippians 2: 14)

8. Homemaking – A Virtuous Woman is a homemaker. She creates an inviting atmosphere of warmth and love for her family and guests. She uses hospitality to minister to those around her. (Proverbs 31: 15, Proverbs 31: 20 – 22, Proverbs 31: 27, Titus 2: 5, 1 Peter 4: 9, Hebrews 13: 2)

9. Time – A Virtuous Woman uses her time wisely. She works diligently to complete her daily tasks. She does not spend time dwelling on those things that do not please the Lord. (Proverbs 31: 13, Proverbs 31: 19, Proverbs 31: 27, Ecclesiastes 3, Proverbs 16: 9, Philippians 4:8 )

10. Beauty – A Virtuous Woman is a woman of worth and beauty. She has the inner beauty that only comes from Christ. She uses her creativity and sense of style to create beauty in her life and the lives of her loved ones. (Proverbs 31: 10Proverbs 31: 21 – 22, Proverbs 31: 24 -25, Isaiah 61: 10, 1 Timothy 2: 9, 1 Peter 3: 1 – 6)

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Why You Should Stop Searching for ‘The One’

Turn on any rom-com, listen to a sappy love song or watch most sitcoms, and you’ll likely encounter the same message: The key to finding love is committing to finding “the one.”

Pastor and author Andy Stanley, however, thinks that message is backward.

In his new book, The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating Stanley talks about why, in order to find the person we’re going to spend the rest of our lives with, we should focus on being the person that our future spouse is looking for, as well.

We recently spoke with Stanley about dating, why preparation trumps the idea of commitment and the proper view of premarital sex.

What’s the thesis of your new book, The New Rules For Love, Sex & Dating?

The theme of the book is We should become the person that the person we’re looking for is looking for. Are you the person you’re looking for is looking for?

The reason that’s important is because, in every area of life, we understand that preparation is the key to success, but when it comes to relationships, we think that, no, commitment is the key to success: I don’t need to prepare for a relationship, I just need to meet the right person and commit to that person.

In the book I talk about “the right person myth.” The “right person myth” is When I meet the right person, everything will be all right. But every single married person, every single divorced person knows that’s not the case, because 99 percent of the people who are married, when they stood at the altar and made their commitment or vows, thought they were making a vow to the right person.

We should become the person that the person we’re looking for is looking for.

Preparation trumps commitment every single time. The whole notion that “Once I meet the right person everything will turn out alright,” is predicated upon this lie that, “Hey, relational preparation is irrelevant, I just gotta meet the right person.”

You include a chapter in the book curiously called “designer sex.” Can you tell us what it’s about?

Designer sex is the old-fashioned approach to sex, that says, “Relationships are more important than sex. Build a relationship before you get involved sexually.” In the book, I kind of do twist on this, because our churches are designed for unchurched people. So I’ve written this book with the assumption not that every person is going to assume everything in the Bible is true.

So I’ve tried to back way up and ask some tough questions. For example, when people break up—whether it’s dating couple that breaks up, somebody who’s been living together that breaks up or a marriage that breaks up—people do not break up for sexual reasons; people break up because of relationship problems.

In the book, I argue that it makes sense that if there’s a God who loves and there’s a God who created sex—which is an interesting idea in of itself—that what God has to say about this topic is important, and common sense actually supports the New Testament as it relates to sex.

Sexually compatibility is easy, relational compatibility is not. So it just makes sense if you’re thinking in terms of a long-term relationship, we need to load up on the relational aspects of the relationship rather than sexual.

What I’m saying in this book is look, you don’t need a chapter and verse for this; you don’t need to be a church person for this; here’s what we know experientially: That the relationship is the key to happiness, and getting involved sexually on the front end of a relationship masks unhealthy relationships and ultimately undermines sexual satisfaction. Because every married couple and every couple that’s been together 15 or 20 years who has a healthy sexual relationship would tell you that it’s the relationship that drives the sex, not the other way around.
In the book, you talk about a Q&A event where a man asked what’s so wrong with sexual promiscuity. Can you describe that interaction?

This guy was probably 40 years old. He raised his hand—there were about 200 people—and he said, “Look, Andy, I’ll be honest. I’ve been married. I’m divorced. I’m dating. I don’t want to ever get remarried. Why in the world should I adhere to a New Testament approach to sexuality? Why should I not have sex?”

I said, “Well, there’s really no reason for you not to.” I pushed back on him. I said, “Gosh, if all there is to this life is life, you should have sex with whoever you want to, as many times as you want to.” And, of course, everyone in the room got a little uncomfortable.

I said, “If all there is to this life is life, then you’re biology, so just go with your biology. And you’ll have a string of hurt people behind you. Women will become a commodity. You will be disrespectful to women. That’s just what’s going to happen if we’re just biology.” I said to him, “If there’s more to you than biology, and if there’s more to this life than this life, then it’s a really big deal.”

Your worldview should determine how you manage your sexuality and the way your approach sexuality. If there’s a God who loves you and a God that has invited you to address in His heavenly father, that means that every single woman you meet is a daughter to your heavenly father. That should determine how you approach sex, and it should determine how you treat women.

Source: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/why-you-should-stop-searching–one

10 Guys You Should NEVER Date

Just say no to bad dates. Or for that matter, bad relationships. Imagine how simple your love-life could be if you just agreed to that rule of thumb?

But sometimes it’s easier said than done, isn’t it? Sometimes, we miss the warning signs. Or worse yet, ignore them.

No matter who you, how desperate you feel, how long you’ve been single or how badly you’re looking for a date, please do yourself a favor and avoid these 10 guys like the plague:

Mr. Not That Into You

I don’t know what it is about this guy, but let me warn you- he’s addicting. There’s just something about the “unknown” (does he like me, or not?) that keeps you guessing and coming back for more. You can recognize him in that he knows how to talk the talk, but his actions never seem to follow-suit. But the biggest problem with this kind of guy is that he’s using you for as long as you’ll stick around. So do yourself a favor and don’t stick around.

Mr. On Again & Off Again

This guy will do anything to get you to stay on his roller-coaster ride of up and down emotions. One moment you’re “the one” and the next moment he’s confused, confined, and non-committal. What you need to know about this guy is that this isn’t a “phase”, it’s a glimpse of the rest of your life. Talk about some serious nausea. Time to get off the rollercoaster- or better yet- never get on.

Mr. Out of Sight Out of Mind

This guy is sweet, charming, flirtatious, and basically everything you imagined him to be, while you’re around. But when you’re not around? Well, he’ll be that same sweet, charming, and flirtatious guy with the next girl. For him, it’s not about commitment, it’s about the moment. That’s definitely not a guy you can trust. Ever.

Mr. Keepin’ My Options Open

Oh yeah, he says he’s interested. He might even tell you he’s in love. But then why can’t he let go of his past? Why do you find yourself worried about who else he’s interacting with, and how he’s interacting with them? With the right guy there are no options- there are only relationships. And healthy relationships can only develop and progress when the focus is on one person at a time.

Mr. Let’s Get Physical, Physical

The thing that makes me crazy about Mr. Physical is that he’s SO OBVIOUS…yet so charming. He makes you think that he’s really into you- when all the while his primary focus is on what he can get from you. But even with his obvious advances and fixation on the physical, you’ll find yourself making excuses, giving more and more of yourself until it’s too late. Recognize him quick, and once you do, make a quick break. Don’t get stuck in the physical, because healthy relationships are built on so much more than this.

Mr. Sorta Spiritual

This is the nice guy most girls would fall for. He let’s you choose everything because he wants whatever makes you happy…even when it comes to your spiritual life. He may go to church on Sundays, have good morals, and even say the right things. But deep down, he’s only sort-of spiritual. His life has hints of Jesus (or so you tell yourself), instead of being DEFINED by Jesus. Don’t just settle for a God-fearing man, look for a Jesus-loving man.

Mr. I Don’t Wanna Grow Up

This guy will make you feel more like his mom than his girl. He’ll have you taking care of him before you even know what hit you. And you’ll like it, because it will make you feel important. But what you don’t realize is that a relationship with this guy is sure to be one-sided. So until he’s ready to put down the video games, pay his own bills, and do his own laundry…it’s time to move on to bigger…and “more mature” things- no matter how hot he is. You deserve a partner- not someone who needs a parent.

Mr. All About Me

He may or may not be the kind of guy who’s obsessed with his looks- but one thing is for sure, he’s obsessed with himself. He has all the answers and wants to date a girl who will just nod her head and smile. He doesn’t care what you want, or even who you are, because he makes all the choices and his preferences always trump yours. Stay far away from this guy, and look for a man who is marked by humility and selflessness…because only that kind of man can love you like you deserve to be loved.

Mr. Track-Record

You know all about his history. In fact, this guy has quite a reputation with the ladies. So why on earth did you convince yourself that things would be different with you? This guy will leave you with a broken-heart- just like he left the string of girls before you. Come to terms with the reality that you can’t change him with your love…or with anything else for that matter. Instead, find someone who you can love for who they are- not for what you hope them to be.

Mr. White Lies

A relationship built without honesty, is really no relationship at all. I don’t care if he’s lying about his age, his past, his family, or the color of his car….a lie, is a lie, is a lie. But most importantly, early on in a relationship it’s a big red flag. This guy is marked by a pattern of dishonesty and little white lies. Lies about things that might not even matter. But what matters is the habits that are being formed, and the facade that’s being maintained. A man who has nothing to hide becomes a safe place in which a woman can hide her heart. Look for that kind of a man.

Source: http://truelovedates.com/10-guys-you-should-never-date/?utm_source=True+Love+Dates+-+Love+for+your+Inbox%21&utm_campaign=80e1737351-RSS_EMAIL_CAMPAIGN&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_6ea073922e-80e1737351-207167361

7 Truths About Marriage You Won’t Hear in Church

The Church provides a good foundation for marriage, but here are a few of the things you might not always hear.

Ever wish you had the answers to a test before you walked into the classroom? Maybe some of you did have the answers, but you better keep that to yourself. If you spent time in college, you remember review days where the professor would give some insights about the impending test. Miss review day, and it would be foolish to expect a passing grade.

But it never failed. I would follow the guideline. I would study the handout. But when it came time, the professor would put the exam on my desk and there would be a foreign formula or equation I had never seen—or, at least, one I did not see on the study guide. Looking back, I realize the teacher did not intend for the study guide to be comprehensive. It was simply not possible to include everything from the required reading, class notes and lectures.

Such is the case with the Church and marriage. I am grateful for the foundation the Church gave me in regard to marriage. It was a good study guide. But there some things on the test I did not learn until marriage began. So I am going to give you some answers to the test that some of you might not expect to see. Here are a few truths about marriage I never heard in church:

1. Sex is a Gift From God. Explore It.

God created sex, but through the years, God’s people have allowed Satan to steal this gift—without much of a fight.

I was never educated about sex—and I grew up in a Christian family. My framework for sex was built by my friends at school and the movies I watched. Big uh oh. I still struggle with enjoying the fullness of sex today because of the cloud of lies formed during my teenage years.

It is time for God’s people to take back the gift of sex. The lies surrounding it are ruining lives and marriages. If you are married, explore the fullness of sex for the glory of God. Pray for sexual intimacy with your spouse.

2. There is More Than One Person Out There You Could Marry.

Soulmates are made, not born. Maintaining a healthy relationship is more about commitment than perfection. Every person on earth has imperfections. And the reality is there is more than one person we could spend our lives with.

Soulmates are made, not born. Maintaining a healthy relationship is more about commitment than perfection

I meet too many young people that are waiting for something that is not real. “I just couldn’t marry her because she smacked her food.” “He just wasn’t the one. But I know my soulmate is still out there. I just have to keep looking.”

What if God does not want you to find a perfect person, but find an imperfect person who will draw you closer to Him? What if God desires you to marry a person with flaws to expose yours? What if God wants to teach you the value and life found in committing to one person forever, not the exhausting pursuit of searching your entire life to find the perfect person?

3. The First Year of Marriage is Really Hard.

What have we done? Are we going to make it? Why is this so hard? These are all questions I asked myself many times during my first year of marriage.

We were arguing. We were fighting. It was really hard. And every day I thought something was wrong. Nobody warned me about the difficulty of the first year.

If you are in the first year of marriage and thinking about giving up, you’re not alone. Everyone struggles. Persevere. There are better days coming. Your marriage will get better. Stick with it.

4. A Spouse Does Not Complete You.

Jerry Maguire has brainwashed a generation of people to believe a lie. Spouses do not complete people. I bought this lie, and it wasn’t until I let go of any notion my wife could fill some void that I was able to truly love her. I had been expecting Tiffani to do something only God can do.

If you are empty, broken or insecure and you believe a spouse is the silver bullet to your problems, buckle up. It will be a bumpy ride. You will never be able to enjoy the beauty of marriage if you think your spouse’s job is to complete you.

5. Marry Someone With Similar Goals, Dreams and Passions.

Marry someone who is a Christian, yes. But I would go further—marry someone with similar passions and dreams. Of course, no two people are going to want exactly the same things in life. But some things are harder to work through than others. For example, if you love foreign missions and your potential spouse hates going overseas, tension is going to arise.

If your spouse has similar passions, they will be able to understand your struggles and fully support your pursuits. There is much power in two people living life with the same goals, dreams and passions for life.

6. Marriage is Not for Everybody.

Paul talks about this in Corinthians. He tells the church at Corinth to remain in the situation they are in. If unmarried, then stay unmarried. If married, then stay married. Later, he says, “So then the person who marries his fiancee does well, and the person who doesn’t marry does even better” (1 Corinthians 7:38).

Maybe it is time for God’s people to accept the reality that God has not called everyone to marry. I have talked with young men and women that are almost consumed with finding a spouse. And most of the pressure comes from church. Once a person reaches mid-twenties, we assume something is wrong with them if they have not married.

Marriage is holy and good, but it is also possible to follow Jesus without a spouse.

Shame on us. Marriage is holy and good, but it is also possible to follow Jesus without a spouse.

7. Marriage is Not About You.

I love weddings. But in an increasingly individualistic, “me” culture, weddings create a potentially dangerous situation. It is all about the bride and groom. Everyone looks at them. Encourages them. Congratulates them.

Many couples have bought the lie of the wedding day: It is all about me. But marriage is at odds with this mindset. A successful wedding day is one where everyone serves you. A successful marriage is one where you serve your spouse. The wedding day is a day where the spotlight is on you. Marriage has no spotlight. The wedding day is joyous and celebratory. Many seasons of marriage are about persevering and not letting go through the storms.

Embrace your wedding day. Prepare for it. Celebrate it. But do not make the mistake of believing the lie that it’s all about you. After your 20 minutes of fame, the spotlight is gone forever. It is no longer about you (and this is a good thing, you will see).

This article was originally posted at frankmatthewpowell.com
Source: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/7-truths-about-marriage-you-won%E2%80%99t-hear-church#uX8fAJmuxo6FmI4R.99