How do I learn how to be confident?

“How do I learn how to be confident?
Day 6/31
You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone...

You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. – Mt. 5:14-15

“There’s something different about her.” It’s a phrase that we have seen or heard at some point in our lives in a chick flick or a shampoo commercial or in a romance novel. Maybe when you hear the phrase, you automatically think about a beautiful woman walking down the street and capturing the glances of everyone she passes. Maybe you think about a woman in your life or a woman you follow on social media who seems to have discovered the fountain of youth and lives a carefree, joy-filled life. Whether you aspire to be like that woman or not, we’ve all had that moment where someone captured our attention or inspired us and all in all, it just seemed like there was something different about them.

But while we may find inspiration to have this kind of presence and confidence about ourselves, as followers of Christ, we must remember that it is only the light that comes from Jesus that truly matters. Let’s be the kind of women who radiate His light more than we radiate with what the world says is confidence. Even on the days that we’re having a great hair day, a great work day, or we’re just in a generally good mood, we’ve got to continue to let what stands out about us be the light that shines from within us because of Christ!

Also, this has nothing to do with personality. Being a light isn’t reserved for the extroverts and outgoing. God wants to use each of us in unique ways to be a light. All around you there are coworkers, classmates, friends, and family members in your life who are desperately needing to be reminded of Jesus’ love for them. Go out of your way to put others first this week. Make it a point to be that friend that encourages. This world needs more people like this. This world needs more Jesus! Let people see that you don’t stand out from the crowd because you’re super confident but because Jesus is at the center of everything you do.

Biblical context + further reading: Mt. 5:13-16

Captured by Jeni Karay

Warna yang sama bisa tampak sunyi dan riang sekaligus. Langit paham hal-hal semacam itu. Kata-katamu bicara terlalu banyak tapi tidak pernah cukup. Langit selalu cukup dengan cuaca dan pertanyaan-pertanyaan.

Jangan percaya pada ksrtupos dan kamera seorang petualang. Menyelamlah ke ingatannya dan temukan senja selalu basah di sana. Kau hanya boleh jatuh cinta kepada ingatan yang menyerupai langit: rentan dan tidak mudah dikira.

Dia meninggalkanmu agar bisa selalu mengingatmu. Dia akan pulang untuk membuktikan mana yang lebih kuat, langit atau matamu.

~Aan Mansyur

When You Get Back

People at Amai Beach, Papua. Captured by Jeni Karay

And so my prayer is that your story will have involved some leaving and some coming home, some summer and some winter, some roses blooming out like children in a play. My hope is your story will be about changing, about getting getting something beautiful born inside you about learning to love a woman or a man, about learning to love a child, about moving yourself around water, around mountains, around friends, about learning to love others more than we love ourselves, about learning oneness as a way of understanding God.

We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and the resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn’t it? It might be time for you to go. It might be time to change, to shine out. I want to repeat one word for you: Leave. Roll the word around on your tounge for a bit. It is a beautiful word, isn’t it? So strong and forceful, the way you have always wanted to be. And you will not be alone. You have never been alone. Don’t worry. Everything will still be here when you get back. It is you who will have changed.

You Are Powerful

Papuan Lady at Humbold Bay Festival, Captured by Jeni Karay

If you want to do anything just about anything, you can. Your life and circumtances, in this current moment,do not define who you are. You are more than your circumtances and you are more than your past.

You are not broken.You are fully capable and functioning woman of beauty and power. Think about what you have marched through. Think of all the times you picked yourself up.

You are worthy. You are woman of worth, as all women are; as all people are.

You are beautiful. Stop looking around,comparing yourself to everyone else. There is no one else like you in the entire world.

You are powerful.


Believe in Your Value

Take a minute and look into your heart. How do you feel about yourself? If your answer does not agree with God’s Word, I encourage you to begin today renewing your mind about yourself.

See yourself as God sees you. Study God’s Word and you will find out that you are precious, created in your mother’s womb by God’s own hand. You are not an accident. Even if your parents told you they never really wanted you, I can assure you that God wanted you. You are valuable, you have worth, you are gifted, you are talented, and you have a purpose on this earth.

Not only must we ask God for things He has promised us but we must receive them (see John 16:24). If you feel unworthy, you probably won’t ask, and even if you do, you won’t receive by faith. Don’t let feelings rule you anymore. Take a step of faith and start improving your quality of life today. Believe that you make good decisions, that you are a valuable person with a great future, and something good is going to happen to you today!

Pray: Lord, I ask You to imprint Your love into the depths of my heart. I believe You have a great future for me and that I can walk in Your purpose for my life. Amen.

From the book The Confident Woman Devotional by Joyce Meyer. Copyright 2011 by Joyce Meyer. Published by FaithWords.

Better With Age: 10 Pros And Cons Of Dating An Older Man

Better With Age: 10 Pros And Cons Of Dating An Older Man

Here are a list of pros and cons to consider if you decide to date older:


He’s More Experienced in Life

Whether it’s in his career, knowledge acquired overtime, relationships or even in the bedroom, this man knows what he’s doing and knows what he wants. He’s confident and can teach you a thing or two with his advice.

He’s Financially Secure

He may be older, but he’s learned a lesson or two about making money, saving money and balancing his checkbook. He cares about his future and even retirement.

He’s Emotionally Stable

The older men are the calmest human beings. This is great for me, since I am a whirlwind during the week and it balances me out. He’s been through multiple ups and downs in relationships, and his feelings are in check. Plus, he’s a great listener.

He Loves Romance

With endless kisses, hugs and soft lit candles, he goes the distance to make sure you are happy and satisfied. When I would go away on trips and had my guy take care of my apartment, I always came home to flowers on the table, chocolate or homemade gifts. Aw!

You Look Good Together

Besides feeling good together in public, you look great together, too. Even though there have been those people who have judged, you’ll be surprised that there are more people on your side than you think. I got this comment many times with my last relationship and felt even more confident hearing it.


He’s Set in His Ways

This is probably the most challenging thing to overcome when dating an older guy. With him, what you see is what you get. Although you can’t change a man (or even a woman for that matter), the key is to bend for one another so both of your needs are fulfilled.

He’s Afraid of Commitment

When you come across an older man and learn he’s single, have you ever found yourself saying to your friends, “There’s a reason he’s alone and still single”? There’s always a reason, but the best thing is not to push. If it’s meant to be, it will be. For now, have fun and see where it might lead.

He Gets Compared To a Father Figure

This comment might make him and even you feel insecure. The important thing is how you two feel about one another and the good times you share. And don’t call him an “old man,” even if you’re joking; it will only make matters worse!

He Feels He Has “Power” in the Relationship

Personally and professionally, he has one up on you and may think only he has a right to call the shots in the relationship. It’s nice once in a while to let the man take the lead, but it shouldn’t be a power struggle. You both have something equally to give one another.

He’s Not the Life of the Party

He loves spending time with you, but may want to call it an early night instead of going to the next big party. Try to find the balance between going out and staying in.

Stay in for a couple nights by making dinner and watching a movie and doing one extreme outing during the week, even if it’s just for a bit. If he can’t, that’s what your friends are for!

Photo Courtesy: CW/Gossip Girl